Kindness and Encouragement

“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.”

~ Leo Buscaglia

The other day, one of my children shared a compliment that a teacher had given him.  He beamed as he told the story.  Teachers and other adults in children’s lives have incredible influence over them.  And positive comments by an adult in charge can stay with a young person for a long time.

Kindness and a Cousin

“A warm smile is the universal language of kindness.”

~ William Arthur Ward

My son started at a new school this year.  His cousin, two years older, is there, too, and has taken quite an interest in looking after his younger cousin.  My son frequently will come home and share a story about how his cousin helped him out.  The latest one involved the racks for backpacks outside the cafeteria.  When my son arrived for lunch, he did not see an open space in which to stow his backpack, so his ever-vigilant cousin moved his own and made space for my son.

The Kindness of Double-Checking

“No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted.”

~ Aesop

The other day, one of my mom friends ordered for delivery from our favorite pizza place.  A few minutes later, one of the guys who works there called her to double-check on her order because he did not think it was correct.  And he was right – my friend had mistakenly not ordered cheese on her sandwich.  My friend was surprised and grateful.

Kindness and Signs

“Most smiles are started by another smile.”

~ Frank A. Clark

The other day when I drove by a small park in my neighborhood, I noticed that there were handmade signs on the fence.  I looked closer and realized that the signs were thanking our police and fire departments as well as the municipal government for their work helping us to recover from the recent hurricane.  I have to think that the signs, which face the main street in our neighborhood, make those first responders smile when they see them.

Kindness and Celebration

“Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless.”

~ Mother Teresa

We recently went to a neighborhood restaurant for a family birthday celebration, complete with dessert at the end with something that looked like fireworks on top.  As we were finishing, the waiter came and said that dessert was on the house.  He also thanked us for choosing their restaurant for our birthday celebration.  It certainly was good customer service, but it was also a very nice thing to say.

Kindness and Homework

“The strong bond of friendship is not always a balanced equation; friendship is not always about giving and taking in equal shares.  Instead, friendship is grounded in a feeling that you know exactly who will be there for you when you need something, no matter what or when.”

~ Simon Sinek

I recently had to ask one of my dearest mom friends if she could not only take my children to an after-school activity, but also keep one of my children for the evening as it was Back to School Night at one of the schools.  I felt badly – two asks – but she agreed the way she always does as if it’s no big deal.  I told my friend that my son, who would be at her house, would do his homework or study, which I knew he could do on his own and quietly.  When I got home, my son told me that my friend offered to help him study and that she ended up quizzing him on the words he was studying for Spanish.  Not once, but twice.

The Kindness of Many Hands

“Many hands make light work.”

~ John Heywood

The other day, my family and I got together for a family dinner.  It was grandmother, siblings and children, but one of my brothers was missing.  He couldn’t join us because he and other members of his wife’s family had driven more than two hours to help his wife’s aunt and uncle clear the post-hurricane tree debris on the property where they have a second home.

The Kindness of a Pilgrim’s Prayer

“Prayer is an act of love; words are not needed.”

~ St. Teresa of Avila

A friend of mine is doing the Camino de Santiago.  She is on a six-week walking pilgrimage to the tomb of St. James in north-west Spain.  We text frequently and I also follow her journey on Facebook.  She has shared beautiful photographs and she also has let me know that she is praying for me.  I feel blessed to be included in her prayers.

The Kindness of Having People on Our Team

"We can’t help everyone, but everyone can help someone."

~ Ronald Reagan

On NPR this morning, I heard a touching story about a gentleman with autism who recently had a very difficult time with flight delays.  The gentleman recounted how he had felt completely overwhelmed, and wound up crying and upset for hours at the airport – something that had not happened to him since childhood. But no one approached him to ask him what was wrong.  Finally, an airline employee noticed him and offered help.  The gentleman with autism said that it was so significant to him to be recognized as a person and to feel that he had someone on his team.  With the employee’s help, he was able to get onto the next flight.  And his being able to deal with that very difficult situation emboldened him to deal with other challenges.

That story reminded me of a recent challenge that I had – it was work-related, not personal, but I truly did not know what to do.  It finally occurred to me to call on two friends who are also professional colleagues and to ask for help.  Needless to say, they came through and like the gentleman with autism, I felt that I had someone – in this case, two people – on my team. 

For some of us, and I certainly include myself in this group, it is difficult to ask for help.  We think that we should be able to figure everything out.  But sometimes we can’t.  And how wonderful when we find people who want to be on our team and help us accomplish what we cannot do alone.

Kindness and Hurricane Help

“We should learn to live and love our neighbors as ourselves for the sake of peace and progress.”

~ David McCallum

Our violin teacher, who has two very young children, evacuated to another state before our recent hurricane.  Her home had a lot of tree debris, but when she returned, she found that her neighbors had cleared most of it.  In addition, after she arrived, one of her neighbors came over and raked her backyard.  She felt incredibly blessed to have such thoughtful neighbors.

Kindness and Birthday Cake

“Cakes are special. Every birthday, every celebration ends with something sweet, a cake, and people remember.  It’s all about the memories.”

~ Buddy Valastro

My lovely friend recently texted me to say that the bakery that makes our favorite chocolate cake had closed – due to extensive hurricane damage.  I was convinced that she was mistaken as this bakery has been around for years and because I could not imagine that our favorite cake was gone.  (My lovely friend introduced me to this chocolate delicacy years ago and it has become my birthday cake of choice.)  Silly though it seemed, I decided to try calling.  There was a recording that directed vendors to a corporate office on the other side of the country.  I called the corporate office, but the woman told me what I already knew.  I asked if the bakery had made the cake on premises and was there no way to get the cake.  Nada.  I told my friend that I had spoken to the corporate office and gotten nowhere.  She asked me for the number and said that she would call.  Apparently, my lovely friend shared with the woman that a friend’s birthday was next week and that she really wanted the cake.  The woman told her that she would contact the bakery and see if they could make one more cake.

The Kindness of Organizing Birthday Celebrations

“You take away all the other luxuries in life, and if you can make someone smile and laugh, you have given the most special gift: happiness.”

~ Brad Garrett

I recently received a text from a friend who was organizing a lunch for the birthday of a mutual friend.  Nothing major or complicated, just lunch with a small group of women.  It might not seem like a big deal, but given the hustle and bustle of our daily lives, remembering the upcoming birthday and reaching out to others with enough time doesn’t always happen.  Some people don’t care about their birthdays.  (I even have a friend who does not like to celebrate her birthday.)  But I know a whole bunch of people – including me! – who do.  In fact, I count among my blessings a friend who has been organizing a birthday lunch for me for years.  For those of us who enjoy celebrating birthdays, especially with friends we love and never see enough, the birthday-organizing friend is a treasure!

Kindness and Hospitality

“True hospitality is marked by an open response to the dignity of each and every person.  Henri Nouwen has described it as receiving the stranger on his own terms, and asserts that it can be offered only by those who ‘have found the center of their lives in their own hearts.’”

~ Kathleen Norris

One of my dearest friends evacuated for the hurricane and was fortunate to return home to a house that had electricity.  Friends of hers did not have power, so she invited them to stay with her for several days – even though they have a dog and even though my friend dislikes dogs.  I have no doubt that there are many hurricane hospitality stories, but to those who benefitted from someone else’s hospitality, the kindness is priceless.

The Kindness of No Pressure

“The most I can do for my friend is simply be his friend.”

~ Henry David Thoreau

The other day, I received a text from a close college friend.  “No need to text back,” she wrote.  She just wanted me to know that she was thinking about me.  I appreciated both her thinking about me and her letting me know that I did not have to respond.  

The Kindness of Companionship

“Mature love is composed and sustaining; a celebration of commitment, companionship, and trust.”

~ H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

One of my neighbors is a widow in her 80s.  She now has a male friend and I run into them frequently on their way out or in church.  They seem to share quite  a lot together.  I recently sat behind them at church and I thought how wonderful for both of them to have such nice companionship.

Kindness and Good Food

“As much as we need a prosperous economy, we also need a prosperity of kindness and decency.”

~ Caroline Kennedy

I recently stopped by our favorite pizza place to see when it would reopen after the hurricane.  The owner shared that he was getting ready to reopen, but that he had spent time throwing away the old food, buying new supplies and preparing the restaurant.  He said that he knew other restaurants opened earlier with food they probably shouldn’t be selling, but that he did not want to do that.

Kindness and a Prayer

“Prayer is man’s greatest power!”

~ W. Clement Stone

As Mr. Rogers said, whenever something bad happens, you can always find the helpers.  And after this hurricane, there are helpers everywhere.  If you haven’t seen the video of Sister Margaret Ann wielding a chain saw, I highly recommend it. 

Another church-related story:  The rector of one of our local churches shared that there was an electric-company truck parked in her church’s parking lot.  She went to talk to the driver, who asked her if he could pray inside the church.  The rector unlocked the church, and the gentleman took a break from the heat and his work to say a little prayer.

Kindness and a Cold One

“Let me encourage you to get up every day and focus on what you do have in life.  Be thankful for the blessings of the little things, even when you don’t get what you expect.”

~ Victoria Osteen

As we prepared for the hurricane last week, a friend from high school texted to say that she remembered my bringing her a cold Coke with ice during a hurricane 25 years ago.  Back then, we had been without electricity for a while and I’m not sure where I found the soda and the ice, but I knew she would enjoy it.  Fast forward all these years and another friend of mine showed up post-hurricane with my favorite orange soda.  Sometimes it’s all about the little things – especially when you can’t control the big things.

Kindness and a Teenager Post-Hurricane

“True beauty is born through our actions and aspirations and in the kindness we offer to others.”

~ Alex Wek

All the schools in our area are closed because of the hurricane.  One teenager I know asked her mother to reach out to a single working mother in their neighborhood to see if the mom needed the teenager to watch her children – free of charge.  The single mother gratefully accepted the teen's kind offer.

Kindness and the Hurricane Hostess

“There is no friend like an old friend who has shared our morning days, no greeting like his welcome, no homage like his praise.”

~ Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr.

One of my dearest friends invited three generations of my family to stay with her when we became hurricane evacuees.  Even though we have been best friends for a few decades, I could not have imagined the extent of her generosity and thoughtfulness.  To say that she was uber-prepared is an understatement.  She had terrific battery-operated lanterns and fans.  She bought all kinds – and amazing quantities – of food, which including items that delighted my children, such as three flavors of chocolate chips for pancakes.  She thoughtfully outfitted our rooms and even bought my daughters shampoo she thought they might like.  But the best part was how gracious she was and how she made us feel so welcomed.  Even though we quadrupled the population of her house, she never made us feel that it was an imposition.  We feel blessed to have made it through a massive hurricane and very blessed to have been hosted in such an incredibly warm way.

Kindness, Hurricane and Humor

"A day without laughter is a day wasted."
~ Charlie Chaplin

Yes, there has been a theme in my blog post these past few days -- hurricane and all things hurricane.  As we monitor the weather situation by switching from news channel to news channel, the anxiety waxes and wanes depending on the latest -- winds, rain, tornado warnings, oh my!  Thanks to our relatively recent technology, we are able to check in frequently with family and friends through texts.  Of course, the most important thing about that capacity is that we can confirm that everyone is okay.  A side benefit is the endless funny texts that are sent, mostly memes.  They have made me smile, they have made me laugh out loud and I have sent them on hoping that they can have the same effect on others.

Kindness and a Place to Go

"When the storms of life come, if they come to me personally, to my family or to the world, I want to be strong enough to stand and be a strength to somebody else, be shelter for somebody else."
-- Anne Graham Lotz

With a large and dangerous hurricane headed our way, conversations inevitably included "Where are you going?" or "Do you have a place to go?"  After packing for what seemed like days, we finally loaded the children and as many of our belongings as possible into the car and drove to our safe haven -- the house of one of my dearest friends.  When I arrived, she came out to greet me and as I hugged her, I felt incredibly blessed.  I thanked her and she shrugged it off.  I know that I will never be able to thank her enough and I don't know that she will ever understand how very much it means to me that in the middle of a very scary time, she gave us "a place to go."

Kindness on the Road

“The everyday kindness of the back roads more than makes up for the acts of greed in the headlines.”

~ Charles Kuralt

My lovely friend headed out of town yesterday with her family to get away from the hurricane heading our way.  We check in with each other frequently and earlier today she shared how nice everyone whom she has met along the way has been.  “It’s like the whole state is in this together,” she texted.  Kindness always helps – especially during challenging times.

Kindness and the Hurricane House Guest

“The simple act of caring is heroic.”

~ Edward Albert

Preparing to evacuate for Hurricane Irma, I remembered evacuating for another hurricane probably close to 20 years ago.  I was going to my parents’ house and I invited a friend who lived in my same beachside building to join us.  All these years later, I still recall her being the perfect hurricane house guest.  In addition to bringing her own toiletries and belongings, my friend brought additional paper goods, her own water and a number of snacks to share with everyone.  Although she has since moved away, I texted my friend today to say that I still remembered her incredible thoughtfulness.  She remains my inspiration as I prepare to become a house guest this time.  

Kindness and Hurricanes

“Our job on earth isn’t to criticize, reject, or judge.  Our purpose is to offer a helping hand, compassion, and mercy.  We are to do unto others as we hope they would do unto us.”

~ Dana Arcuri

Thankfully, kindness and hurricanes seem to go together.  In anticipation of a major hurricane, I was touched to receive texts and emails from friends and colleagues checking in and offering sanctuary in case my family and I needed to evacuate.  In the midst of great uncertainty, it was reassuring to know that friends and co-workers were thinking about us and I appreciated their gracious offers of shelter.

Kindness and Late Check-Out

“It is the service that we are not obliged to give that people value most.”

~ James Cash Penney

No matter that we get late check-out at hotels – my family and I are generally scrambling to get ourselves out the door even by the extended time.  During a recent weekend away, I was able to secure a late check-out of an additional hour.  As we closed in on the hour, one of us was still showering and the others were rushing to get everything packed up.  I called the Front Desk to see if I could negotiate an additional half an hour.  To to my great surprise and delight, the young woman who answered said, “Don’t worry, take your time.”  I breathed a sigh of relief.  We ended up needing only an additional 15 minutes, but not having to run around breathless was a great gift.

Kindness, Greetings and Smiles

“Send out a cheerful, positive greeting, and most of the time you will get back a cheerful, positive greeting.”

~ Zig Ziglar

My family and I recently went on a weekend trip to a small beach town a couple of hours from where we live.  It’s a very laid back place – it almost feels like a trip back in time to a few decades ago.  One morning, we rented a four-person surrey and off we went along the bicycle trails.  My husband insisted on greeting everyone we met along the way – other bicyclists, walkers…  We teased him, but the truth is that he got a return greeting every time.  And nearly always, a smile.

Kindness and Colleagues

“I think you need to love giving compliments as much as you love receiving them.”

~ Yami Gautam

The other day, I overheard a colleague in a medical office call another colleague who had already left for the day to tell her about kind words and appreciation that a patient had shared about the first colleague.  I wondered if the colleague who called the other knew that the second woman could use a morale boost.  Whatever the reason, it was a very thoughtful thing to do.

Kindness and a Sweet Delivery

“All you need is love.  But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt.”

~ Charles M. Schulz

It was the end of a long back-to-school week when my lovely friend texted me to say that she wanted to drop off something at my house.  The surprise turned out to be the most delicious pumpkin chocolate chip bread I have ever tasted.  The treat was very appreciated and her thoughtfulness even more so.