Kindness and Encouragement

“If you have a word of encouragement, you can do anything.”

~ Hilton Als

On a recent evening at a pizza restaurant close to our home, a middle school-aged boy sat at a table intently drawing on his placemat while at dinner with his family.  A couple sat close by at the restaurant’s bar.  The woman of the couple walked over to the boy and complimented his drawing.  She said that she had enjoyed watching him draw and told him that he was very good.  When the couple finished eating and as they were walking out, the woman stopped by the boy’s table again.  “One day, I’m going to say, ‘I saw that artist at a pizza place,’” she said.  And with a big smile, she said goodbye.

Kindness and a Phone Call

“Never suppress a generous thought.”

~ Camilla Eyring Kimball

Post-event thank yous now seem to take place over emails or texts, so I was surprised to receive a call from a professional colleague about an event in which we had recently participated.  He shared that he had had trouble sending an email and then figured he would try an old-fashioned phone call.  It was a welcomed change. 

Kindness and Little Surprises

“There is no surprise more magical than the surprise of being loved:  It is God’s finger on man’s shoulder.”

~ Charles Morgan

I love little surprises and no one does little surprises better than my mother.  On a recent morning, she called to say that she had left “a little something” outside my front door.  When I opened the door, I found a beautifully wrapped package – Easter themed and egg-shaped.  It looked so pretty that I took a photo of it before opening it.  Inside I found my favorite lipstick shade, which also happens to be incredibly difficult to find.

The Kindness of my Village

“I love those connections that make this big old world feel like a little village.”

~ Gina Bellman

My village comes through.  Again and all the time.  On a recent evening, I had to take one child in one direction and another needed to be elsewhere.  I texted my village.  A volunteer immediately appeared as did a back-up.  And, of course, they made it seem as though it was no big deal.  But a favor is generally a big deal to the person who needs it.

Kindness and our Violin Teacher

“Happiness is a thing to be practiced, like the violin.”

~ John Lubbock

Over the years that she has worked with us, our violin teacher has demonstrated many acts of kindness.  Most recently, she was away and not available for the usual in-person lessons, but she called to let me know that she would be available if any of my children wanted to play for her via FaceTime.  

Kindness and Chocolate Chip Cookies

“All you need is love.  But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt.”

~ Charles M. Schulz

After a busy day at work, I was pleasantly surprised by one of my children, who decided to bake chocolate chip cookies for me as a special treat.  Chocolate = kindness, at least in my book.

Kindness and a Gift at Church

“Kindness is loving people more than they deserve.”

~ Joseph Joubert

On a recent Sunday after church, an older woman with whom I have become friendly had two beautiful crosses made from pieces of palm frond.  I asked her if she had made them and she said that someone at the church had given them to her.  She offered to give me one and I said no because I knew she wanted to take it home to her husband.  But she insisted.  

Kindness and Chivalry

“Chivalry isn’t dead.  It’s just no longer gender-based.”

~ Letitia Baldrige

On a recent weekend morning, I was at a work-related event that began with a Mass in an auditorium.  The room quickly filled with people and I found myself standing.  A gentleman I had just met that morning gallantly offered me his seat.  I gratefully accepted it.

The Kindness of Appreciation

“Appreciation is a wonderful thing:  It makes what is excellent in others belong to us as well.”

~ Voltaire

As I was paying for several items at a bookstore recently, I handed two greeting cards to the cashier with the barcodes on the back of the cards facing up.  The cashier thanked me for making it easier for him to scan the codes.  I jokingly replied that I was surprised he noticed.  “I always thank customers when they do that because it’s really thoughtful,” he said.  Clearly, it’s not a big deal on the customer’s part, but I thought it was very nice of the cashier to be so appreciative.

Kindness and Organizing Activities

“Organizing is what you do before you do something, so that when you do it, it is not all mixed up.”

~ A.A. Milne

One of my children recently had a few days off from school.  Another mom organized lessons with a local artist for her child and mine.  The children learned new techniques, produced several nice pieces and had a wonderful time.

Kindness and Thoughtfulness

“The purest and most thoughtful minds are those which love colour the most.”

~ John Ruskin

Sometimes, to be thought of is enough.  My lovely friend recently texted me with a photo of a beautiful flower arrangement.  At the end of an event that we both attended, she was told that she could take one of the flower arrangements.  Knowing that I would like the flowers, she looked around to see if I was still there.  She couldn’t find me, but she texted me to show me the flowers and let me know that she had thought about me.  It reminded me again that people don’t know we are thinking about them unless we tell them.

Kindness at Church

“Remember there’s no such thing as a small act of kindness.  Every act creates a ripple with no logical end.”

~ Scott Adams

An older gentleman in our community attended our church for the first time on a recent Sunday.  After the service, he asked a woman at church if she could give him a ride home.  The woman’s husband graciously agreed to take the gentleman.  

The Kindness of a Little Help

“We are all here on earth to help others; what on earth the others are here for I don’t know.”

~ W. H. Auden

On a recent Sunday, as I was walking into church, I found myself walking behind two older gentlemen.  One gentleman was in his late 70s or early 80s and the second one was probably older and certainly more frail.  The younger man helped the older one up a few stairs and then walked close to him to make sure that his older friend was alright.  As I watched them, I found myself smiling at the small things that we can do to help each other.

The Kindness of a Late-Night Treat

“Treat others as you wish to be treated.  Don’t just be nice, but be kind to other people.  That can be so rewarding.”

~ Mary Lambert

On a recent evening, one of my closest friends called to say that she was stopping by with a late-night delivery of… Nutella pastries!  Who knew that such a thing existed?!?  My family and I were absolutely thrilled.  

The Kindness of a Back Stage Peek

“Kindness is always fashionable, and always welcome.”

~ Amelia Barr

My family and I recently attended an art exhibit opening at someone’s home.  The daughter of the host offered to give us a behind-the-scenes tour and shared with us various artworks that were not part of the exhibit.  

The Kindness of Making it Easy to Ask

“Be patient and understanding.  Life is too short to be vengeful or malicious.”

~ Phillips Brooks

None of us knows everything – including everything we think we’re supposed to know.  I am blessed with a colleague who makes it easy to ask him all kinds of questions, including those to which I think I’m supposed to know the answer.  Sometimes, he explains the answers to me patiently.  At other times, he tells me that he doesn’t know either and then I feel comfortable asking the question more publicly.

Kindness and a Late-Night Grocery Run

“Gratitude is the fairest blossom which springs from the soul.”

~ Henry Ward Beecher

So you think that you’re in for the night and then one child remembers that he needs to take cookies to school the next day.  Which parent runs out?  The more generous one, of course.  And the other is very grateful.

Kindness and a Best Friend

“Things are never quite as scary when you’ve got a best friend.”

~ Bill Watterson

On a recent evening, in the midst of one of those school dress-up weeks, one of my children realized that she needed a vest for the next day’s outfit.  Too late to go out and buy one; way too late for Amazon.  But not too late to reach out to your best friend – who has remained your bestie even though you have not been in school together for almost five years.  But what is five years when you have been friends since pre-school?  Her best friend came through the way best friends do, and my daughter was all set for the following day’s lunacy.

Kindness and Reassurance

“The greatest gift that you can give to others is the gift of unconditional love and acceptance.”

~ Brian Tracy

Two women I know were talking recently – not talking, actually, but texting.  This is the 21^st century, after all, and they seem to be following in their teenagers’ footsteps.  One friend remarked to the other that she was surprised at a recent reaction by her friend.  Response by her friend:  Sad face.  And then the first woman wrote: “I love you just the way you are!”  Billy Joel may have sung it a few decades ago, but there is nothing like a friend’s reassurance.

Kindness and Thoughtfulness

“Give back in some way.  Always be thoughtful of others.”

~ Jackie Joyner-Kersee

There is an older woman I have met through church.  She is friendly and I always enjoy talking with her.  On a recent Sunday, she brought a newspaper article about standardized tests and college admissions for me that she thought I would find interesting given that I have children who will be applying to college in the not-too-distant future. I was touched that she thought about me and remembered to bring the article.  

The Kindness of Spreading Joy

“Spread love everywhere you go.  Let no one ever come to you without leaving happier.”

~ Mother Teresa

I ran into my lovely friend at church on a recent Sunday.  We spoke for a few minutes after Mass and as I walked to my car, it occurred to me that I always feel better after an interaction with her.  She is always kind, always reassuring…  What a gift – to leave others a little happier than they were before they saw you.

The Kindness of an Encouraging Shove

“It’s amazing what a little encouragement can do.”

~ Winnie Harlow

Sometimes I don’t feel like going to certain events.  I imagine that we are all like that.  Thankfully, we have family members and friends who encourage us to go to places or events we might otherwise skip.  And the surprise, although hardly one anymore, is that we almost always have a better time than we thought we would.

Kindness and the Good Neighbor

“When one neighbor helps another, we strengthen our communities.”

~ Jennifer Pahika

I have a friend who I think of as the quintessential good neighbor.  It first occurred to me when I was at her house one day and someone stopped by to borrow something along the lines of a cup of sugar.  Very Mrs. Cleaver, not so 21^st century.  Fast forward to this week.  Someone called me to ask if I knew how or where they could get candles for a memorial vigil for a teenager who unexpectedly passed away.  I didn’t know, but I asked my good neighbor friend.  Not long after I texted her, another friend called and said that she had heard from my good neighbor friend that I was looking for candles.  I put that person in touch with the person who had initially called me, and the young woman who was planning the memorial now had her candles.

Kindness and a Flower Discount

“Be honest, be nice, be a flower not a weed.”

~ Aaron Neville

On a recent morning, I stopped by a roadside flower stand to buy flowers for a friend.  I was happy that they had her favorite, tulips.  When I went to pay, the gentleman charged me less – he said that he gives a discount to the first customer of the morning.  I don’t know if it is true or not, or if he charged me less than he would usually charge or not, but it felt like a nice thing all the same and I found myself smiling as I got back inside my car.

Kindness, a Teenager and a Taco

“Remember that the happiest people are not those getting more, but those giving more.”

~ H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

One of my favorite teenagers was riding with her mother in their car on her way to an evening activity.  It was a drive-thru kind of evening, so they had just picked up food for the teenager at a Taco Bell.  Stopped in traffic, they saw a gentleman who appeared to be homeless walking between the cars asking for money.  The mother began searching in her purse for her wallet, but the teenager said, “Ask him if he would like a taco.”  The mother rolled down her window and asked the gentleman if he wanted a taco.  He gave her a broad smile and said, “I love tacos!”  And so the teenager gave the gentleman her taco.

Kindness and Affection

“I was born with an enormous need for affection, and a terrible need to give it.”

~ Audrey Hepburn

As I was driving in my neighborhood on a recent evening, I saw an older couple crossing the street.  They seemed to be in their late 70s or perhaps 80s.  The gentleman had his arm around the woman.  Several minutes later, I saw them walking on the sidewalk and the gentleman still has his arm around the woman.  I don’t know if they had been married for 50 years or if it was a new romance, but however long they had been together, their affection made me smile.

Kindness and Graciousness

“We’re all in this human experience together, so let’s try to be kind, gracious, and compassionate to each other.”

~ Kailin Gow

One of my dearest mom friends is a very gracious host.  Recently, she invited me to her house for coffee (which, of course, isn’t just coffee – it’s a full-course brunch).  I realized I was running late, so I texted her to say I would be arriving about 20 minutes later than the time for which she had invited me.  “That’s the perfect time!” she replied.  And that is a perfect friend – never making you feel worse than you already feel.

The Kindness of a Reminder about Sacred Space

“Your sacred space is where you can find yourself again and again.”

~ Joseph Campbell

I recently heard a wonderful sermon by a visiting Jesuit about the importance of maintaining our sacred spaces.  He said that we need to make sure that we make the time and space for the things that truly matter in our lives, like praying and family.  This priest shared that he recently realized that he had spent a day without praying outside of celebrating Mass.  He said that sometimes it is difficult to carve out that time when the busyness of this world encroaches on our lives, but that it is very important to do so.  As I thought about his wise remarks, I realized that when I don’t make enough time for the things that are sacred to me, I feel out of sorts.

Kindness and a Returned Credit Card

“Carry out a random act of kindness, with no expectation of reward, safe in the knowledge that one day someone might do the same for you.”

~ Princess Diana

On a recent weekend, I went to the movies.  A few hours later, I looked for my credit card and could not find it.  After searching everywhere in my purse, I called the movie theater as that was the last place I had used it on the off chance that someone had found it.  To my surprise, someone had found my credit card and turned it in.

Kindness and the Imprint of Love on Hearts

“I know what it is like to be brought up with unconditional love. In my life that came from my grandmother.”

~ Andre Leon Talley

Recently, it was the anniversary of my grandmother’s passing 19 years ago.  My grandmother was a very prominent figure in our childhood, and her memory still looms large within our family nearly two decades later.  She may not be a part of our daily lives the way she once was, but she is a part of who we are.  When I look at a photo of her that I see daily, I am reminded – and buoyed – by her love.  Love leaves an indelible imprint on our hearts.

The Kindness of the Gift of Time

“To give somebody your time is the biggest gift you can give.:

~ Franka Potente

One of my dearest friends stopped by for a visit recently.  It was just going to be a 15-minute chat as she was on her way to a yoga class.  But she decided to forego the yoga class and we ended up going to lunch.  When I told her that I did not want her to miss the yoga class, she replied, “Yoga will always be there, but I don’t always get to spend time with you.”  Our time together was fun and I smiled days later as I recalled how much I appreciate the impromptu lunch.  The gift of time is truly priceless.