Remembering Early Morning Kindness

"In the midst of the sense of tragedy or loss, sometimes laughter is not only healing, it's a way of experiencing the person that you've lost again."
― Alan Alda

I received an e-mail today from the husband of a college friend to say that my friend's mom had passed away.  It saddened me because I had known the mom and had a great deal of affection for her.  Although she lived in another state, I had been a guest at her home on a couple of occasions and we exchanged Christmas cards every year.  My friend's mom was kind and generous, happy and funny. 

Over the years, my friend shared many stories about her mom as well as her opinions.  For example, when we were in college, my friend told me that her mother thought that people who chew gum look like cows chewing their cud.  I quit chewing gum on the spot.  All these years later, I don't let my children chew gum and just last week, I told them that my view was shaped by my friend's mother.

My favorite story about my friend's mom took place when we were sophomores in college.  I was already back at school after a holiday, but my friend was still at home where there was a three-hour time difference.  Eager to call my friend for some reason that has since been forgotten, I waited until what I thought was a reasonable hour.  However, I calculated incorrectly and ended up calling at 5 am.  My friend's mother answered the phone and greeted me in her usual cheery voice.  When my friend came on the line, she said, "What's wrong?"  I had no idea why she was asking until she told me the time it was in her part of the country.  I was mortified and amazed that her mother had said nothing to me about it.  She is up early, my friend explained, and she just figured that I had to talk with my friend.  When I called to express my condolences this evening, my friend and I reminisced about the incident.  So many years later, her mom's kindness made us laugh when it seemed otherwise so hard to do.