The Kindness of My Grandmother

"My grandmother was amazing.  She completely believed in me and was very encouraging.  She would go to the supermarket or the butcher or wherever and tell people, 'My grandson is going to be the next Calvin Klein.'"
― Marc Jacobs

My grandmother would have been 102 today.  There has never been a time in my life when April 6th has not been an important date.  And it continues to be.  I now have a niece born on that day as well as a former colleague, one of my best friends and another friend's daughter.  I am glad to continue the celebration.

Although my grandmother died 15 years ago, I continue to celebrate her birthday.  Sometimes, my celebration is about a Mass said in her honor.  Sometimes, it involves a cake.  On what would have been her 100th birthday, I bought a cake, put the numbers 1-0-0 on it and sang Happy Birthday to her with my children.  I tell them about her.  I share her sayings, her wisdom -- and hopefully her kindness.

It is not overstating things to say that my grandmother adored me.  She lived for her grandchildren and made us feel that we were incredibly special.  She listened to me -- always.  She was very attentive to all of my needs.  She and my grandfather were the first ones to arrive on Visiting Sunday when we were at sleep-away camp.  My childhood friends remember making chocolate chip cookies during sleepovers at my grandmother's house.  Even friends from adulthood remember my grandmother as a source of great love and kindness. 

When I see grandmothers who are there for their grandchildren, I think of my grandmother.  I know that some grandmothers worry about whether they are making a difference in the sometimes complicated lives of their grandchildren -- particularly when they need to step in for parents who are not there.  I tell them and hope they believe that everything they do for their grandchildren really matters.  The kindness of grandmothers lives on and becomes a special part of who we are.