The Kindness of the Check-In Call

"People have entire relationships via text message now, but I am not partial to texting.  I need context, nuance and the warmth and tone that can only come from a human voice."
― Danielle Steel

Calls just to say hello seem rare these days.  Maybe it's because our lives are crazy busy.  But most of my calls with friends seem to be for a reason -- coordinating children's pick-ups, asking a question, advice...  And many of these things are handled by text.  In fact, I find myself texting people to wish them a Happy Birthday.  Really?  If there is an occasion when it would be nice to pick up the phone, that would be it.  And yet, this morning I texted an old friend Happy Birthday instead of calling her.  I told myself that I would try to call her later, but... I didn't.

In Sunday's New York Times Magazine, the last-page Essay was about the author's not liking to answer her cell phone when people call her.  She writes that she avoids incoming calls because they feel like "a potential demand on [her] time and attention."  Not surprisingly, the author, like so many of us, prefers to text. 

And yet, yesterday I received a call from a dear friend, who is one of my favorite people.  "I hadn't talked to you in a few days," she said.  "It felt weird."  This is one of those people whose name I am always happy to see on my cell phone's little screen.  I don't know what it is about her, but then again, maybe I do.  She has a lovely easy way about her.  Despite a very rough year, she is a very happy person.  Her perpetual smile and thoughtfulness don't hurt either.  I was truly happy that she had called just to say hello.

Years ago, one of the telephone companies had a slogan:  Reach out and touch someone.  Funny how we don't extend that kindness more often.  But I am certainly grateful when one of my favorite people does.