Kindness Begins with an Open Heart

"Sometimes we think that to develop an open heart, to be truly loving and compassionate, means that we need to be passive, to allow others to abuse us, to smile and let anyone do what they want with us.  Yet this is not what is meant by compassion.  Quite the contrary.  Compassion is not at all weak.  It is the strength that arises out of seeing the true nature of suffering in the world.  Compassion allows us to bear witness to that suffering, whether it is in ourselves or others, without fear; it allows us to name injustice without hesitation, and to act strongly, with all the skill at our disposal.  To develop this mind state of compassion ... is to learn to live, as the Buddha put it, with sympathy for all living beings, without exception.”
― Sharon Salzberg

My yoga teacher is a wise woman.  In addition to being very mindful and attentive to the levels, needs and progress of her students, she imparts quite a bit of wisdom during yoga class.

A couple of days ago at the end of class, she encouraged us to stay in a "state of gratitude" and to approach everything that happens -- obstacles even -- with an open heart.  She cautioned against becoming rigid.  Ouch!  That struck a chord.  How often do we close our hearts when faced with challenges, or ... dare I say it, challenging people? 

A college friend who works overseas helping Americans abroad recently shared how he handles challenging people.  He said that he reminds himself not to judge:  "Compassion for me is all about putting myself in the place of another to try to understand their motivations and then 'doing for others what I would have them do for me.'"

He acknowledged that sometimes when he is called during his off hours to handle an emergency, his first reaction is not positive, but then he puts himself in the position of the person or family involved and realizes:  "We have to help.  When I do, I ALWAYS feel better and realize that it was more important than anything else I was doing at the time."

When we can muster the strength to keep our hearts open, we inevitably find that kindness and compassion flow more freely.