"Err in the Direction of Kindness"

"Since, according to me, your life is going to be a gradual process of becoming kinder and more loving:  Hurry up.  Speed it along.  Start right now."
― George Saunders, Convocation Speech to University of Syracuse 2013 Graduates

By now, you probably have heard about George Saunders' graduation speech.  If not, here goes:  Saunders, a terrific short-story writer and recipient of the MacArthur Genius Award (among many other awards) gave this year's convocation speech at Syracuse, where he teaches.  Thanks to a July 31st article in The New York Times, the speech has now gone viral.  Saunders says: 

"What I regret most in my life are failures of kindness.

Those moments when another human being was there, in front of me, suffering, and I responded ... sensibly.  Reservedly.  Mildly.

Or, to look at it from the other end of the telescope:  Who, in your life, do you remember most fondly, with the most undeniable feelings of warmth?

Those who were kindest to you, I bet."

Saunders speculates on why we are not kinder.  He says that we are born "with a series of built-in confusions" that includes our thinking that our story is THE story, that we are separate from the universe and that we are permanent.  It is no surprise that Saunders is a student of Nyingma Buddhism, the oldest of the four major schools of Tibetan Buddhism.  Both his advice to be kinder and his thoughts about our "confusions" reflect a Buddhist perspective.

I loved reading his speech and encourage everyone to take a look.  What fascinates me is that a writer's speech encouraging graduates to be kinder two months ago is big news.  It may be because as Joel Lovell wrote in a January New York Times profile on Saunders "you feel as if he understands humanity in a way that no one else quite does, and you're comforted by it."

I am delighted that Saunders' speech has put the spotlight on kindness.  And he does express himself beautifully:

"... to the extent that you can, err in the direction of kindness.  Do those things that incline you toward the big questions, and avoid the things that would reduce you and make you trivial.  That luminous part of you that exists beyond personality -- your soul, if you will -- is as bright and shining as any that has ever been ...  Clear away everything that keeps you separate from this secret luminous place."

A friend of mine wrote to me yesterday that "acts of kindness invite reciprocal kindness -- your displaying true kindness makes it so easy for others to do so in turn."  I believe that Saunders' "secret luminous place" is a place where we are the best versions of ourselves -- a place where kindness flows freely.