Kindness That Surprises

"A part of kindness consists in loving people more than they deserve."
― Joseph Joubert

I had a conversation with a friend today about how hard it is to be kind to people whom we don't like because they don't like us or have been mean to us or whatever the reason might be.  She shared that her husband's approach is to "kill them with kindness" -- something we agreed was very difficult.

A little while after, I ran into an older woman who lives in my community.  I don't like her because she once said an obscenity to me (completely unprovoked) and then another time she hit my child in the head with a door she pushed open without looking (inadvertently, I believe).  Whenever I see this woman, I have a reaction.  Internally, I just go "ugh" and I am even a little scared of her.  For her part, she usually looks straight passed me with what looks to me like a permanent scowl.

But today, perhaps encouraged by the conversation with my friend, I said hi to the woman and then told her to have a nice day.  She was visibly startled -- and I think I was, also.  But then she smiled.  Something inside of me softened a bit, too.  I think my friend's husband may have the right idea after all.