The Kindness of Graciousness

"I think sometimes it is more important to be gracious than to win."
― Dorothy Kilgallen
 

A very special friend was celebrating a milestone birthday tonight with a dinner for a small group of her female friends.  I was looking forward to it, and my husband and I arranged that he would be home in time for me to go.

But my husband had a last-minute work emergency and was running late -- very late.  I stopped by my friend's house before the dinner to drop off some chocolate-covered berries and shared what was going on.

As it got later, I texted my friend and told her to please go ahead and eat without me, and that I would be by as soon as I could.

"Don't worry!!" my friend texted back.  "I know what it's like.  It would be so lovely if you can make it even for a short while!  Thank you again for the berries!"

When I did manage to arrive, my friend greeted me with enthusiasm.  Both then and when I left a couple of hours later, she told me how happy she was that I had been able to go.

As I got to my car, I thought about what a lovely evening it had been -- despite the unexpected snag in my original plans. I realized that my friend had been very kind by being gracious.  She did not make me feel badly about the delay and, instead, made me so happy that I had been able to go.

I have had the opposite experience, however.  In cases with similar unavoidable delays, I have had people become angry with me or with whomever was late or unavailable. Things like that happen, and we can choose how to handle them.  We can become mad and give people a hard time, which benefits no one.  Or we can do as my friend did -- we can be gracious, appreciate the good and let go of the rest.